Stop Comparing & Celebrate Your Individuality!

Stop Comparing

So many of us find ourselves in the toxic situation of comparing ourselves to people that we see online, or people we work with, family members, “influencers”, friends or even celebrities.

It sometimes makes us envious and we feel sad, depressed or even angry! We are all human and these emotions can make us crumble when we are already feeling low.

But this is really not the way to live!

Very early in my career, a very wise colleague told me that we really shouldn’t compare ourselves to anyone. We are all at different stages, phases, we all have different backgrounds, career paths and means.

And the only way to have joy in ourselves and our lives, is to learn to get rid of that negative vibes! And if we can do that, we can actually turn those feelings of jealousy into feelings of admiration.

Appearances, financial situation and relationships – these are probably the area where we compare ourselves to others the most. Do you agree?

Stop Comparing

The way we look

We’ve all done it. We paged through a magazine and wondered what life would be like if we looked like the super model  on the cover ? Or wished we were thinner, taller, prettier?

Everyone has insecurities.  As I’m getting older,  I’ve learned to love my insecurities, my flaws, all my perfect imperfections basically.

In fact, what you believe is a flaw – you are the only one that can see it because you are your hardest critic.

Stop Comparing

Try this =  the next time that  you secretly “wished” you looked like someone, don’t. Admire their appearance instead.

Try it. I dare you –  Compliment them instead of being jealous of them.

Instead of saying “Why is she working out so much, for what?” 

 Say “I love how dedicated she is to her physical health. It’s actually inspiring me to be healthier.”

Relationships & Family Life

When I see happy couples, holding hands or kissing in public, I sometimes think to myself, why are me and Kurt not doing this anymore.

But what I’ve come to realise is that every relationship has bumps and curveballs. Doesn’t it?

For some, they prefer to share only the happy times online or  in public for that matter, so they could look back on the memories and as an outsider, you might think their relationship is a fairy-tale, and without any problems but there is no doubt they have some disagreements or bad days.

When I see a loving couple expressing their love for one another, I try to be inspired by that couple instead of jealous. It doesn’t make me feel sad, just a reminder of what Kurt and I should probably try to do more of.

It’s our own love story after all.

The same applies to being that PERFECT Insta mom! Hate to burst anyone’s bubble – but there isn’t such a thing as a Perfect Mom.

Stop Comparing

Financial Situation

Money does not buy Happiness.

As I was so rightly advised. We are all in different stages, phases and all have our own things to deal with.

In these tight economic times we are all also on a budget.

But if for example, you don’t have the means to travel overseas like all of your Instagram buddies, why not plan a weekend away from home.

You really don’t have to travel via airplane to enjoy a different culture. We are in South Africa. There are so many local traditions, cultures and experiences to live out.

Moral of my story:  be happy with where you are in your life and always aspire to be your best SELF!

Stop Comparing



Outfit details:

Skirt: The Fix

T-Shirt : H&M

Handbag: Macaroon

Sneakers: Cotton On

Denim Jacket: Over a decade old. Shall I say vintage?


  1. Tracy Dawson March 5, 2019

    This is so true Hayley. Thanks for sharing these words of wisdom. If we live by it, we can all go really far 🙂

  2. Naeema March 8, 2019

    Love this post!

    • Hayley March 10, 2019

      Thank you Naeema ❤️


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